(*Fin) by Anberlin

Feels like you're miles from here,
in other towns with lesser names.
Where the unholy ghost doesn't tell
Mary or William exactly what they want to hear.
You remember the house on Ridge Road
told you and the Devil to both just leave me alone.
If this is salvation, I can show you the trembling.
You'll just have to trust me. I'm scared.

I am the patron saint of lost causes.
Aren't we all to you just near lost causes?
Aren't we all to you just lost

Tommy, you left behind
something that will mean everything right before you die.
What if you gained the whole world?
You've already lost four little souls from your life.
Widows and orphans aren't hard to find.
They're home missing daddy who's saving the world tonight.
Wish your drinking would hurry and kill you.
Sympathy's better than having to tell you the truth.

That you are the patron saint of lost causes.
All you are to them is now a lost cause.
All you are to them is now, causes.

Billy, don't you understand?
Timothy stood as long as he could and now
you made his faith disappear.
More like a magician and less like a man of the cloth.
We're not questioning God.
Just those he chose to carry on His cross.
We're no better, you'll see.
Just all of us, the lost causes.

Aren't we all to you just lost causes?
Are we all to you lost?
Lost causes
So all we are to you,
Is all we are, is all we are
All we are is all we are

[Choir:]
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
(Lost causes, all we are is all we are)
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
(To you, lost causes)

Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?
Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?



I think everyone has the fear that they maybe a lost cause.

Some thoughts...

Well, the week of Saint Benedict is nearing an end. Also, today, the day of silence, one of the longest days that I can remember is also nearing an end. So, I thought I would take the time here in my cave of solitude talk about some of the lessons I've learned.

Lesson #1: Scripture speaks. Every morning, at 7:00 am when we would gather to pray we would read a few selected passages of scripture. And oh my goodness, can I just say there is something really special about being reminded of the "bigness" of God before the day begins. Before I step outside, before I go to face the unknown-ness of a new day, it was really comforting and empowering to hear that God still reigns over all.

Lesson #2: My faith/beliefs have to meet with my reality. The first day of the week, we talked about the spiritual discipline of confession. God convicted me of some issues in my life. I'm slowly realizing that if I want to claim to be a Christian, I have to live it. It's not enough to know it in my head, it must flow out into my life and my relationships. It must.

Lesson #3: I see God largely in my relationship with others. Today, when I didn't have my usual interactions or conversation with people, I felt so isolated. This whole day has seemed really gray and lonely. I know that the purpose of a day of silence is so it can just be me and God, but I really thank that's when I see God the most...in the people around me. People are created in the image of God. I see a tiny glimpse of the invisible though his visible creation: humanity. So in some ways I feel that isolating myself from people, as I did today, takes away a part of my connection with God.

Lesson #4: It is okay to be alone. Being so isolated today made me realize that although I don't like to be alone, it is okay to be. I don't have to be constantly going, doing, and talking. It's okay be by myself. Silence is not bad. "Be still and know that I am God." I don't need to constantly fill my life with people and words. There is something to be said for emptiness.

Lesson #5: The presence of God is constant. One morning this week, Kim shared a bit from an A.W. Tozer book. It spoke of how we are always near to God. You can't be nearer to God, and you also can't be farther from God. You are always the same distance from God. I love and hate that thought. It's my personal paradox of wanting to be close to God, but knowing he is close enough to see my sinfulness.

In closing, here is a portion of one of my favorite passages of scripture: Psalm 139. I learned something interesting a while back that Psalm 139 is actually structured as a Psalm of lament. The psalmist wasn't comforted by the fact that God was always there, he was distraught. Sounds like the Psalmist and I share a similar paradox.

1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

Christ have mercy
Lord have mercy
Holy Healer
Strength within
Pass me not
Forsake me not, Lord

Amen

Christ have mercy
Lord have mercy
Faithful Brother
Closest Friend
Pass me not
Forsake me not, Lord

Amen

Christ have mercy
Lord have mercy
Sinless Savior
Judge of men
Pass me not
Forsake me not, Lord

Amen

The Week of St. Benedict

Tomorrow marks the beginning of a spiritual expiriment of sorts for me. Tomorrow is the start of St. Benedict week. Saint Benedict was a monk who lived sometime in the 16th (I think) century. The monks of the order of Saint Benedict lived out their lives by a very strict, very disciplined schedule. So for a week, myself, and some other students here at Prov are going to live this lifestyle. The schedule includes prayer at 7:00 am and going to sleep at 11:00. Included in the week are some elements of fasting, scripture memorization, and practicing a spiritual discipline daily. It also includes a day of silence, that's right, I won't talk for a whole day. I may die.

I'm going to be honest, I'm somewhat dreading this experience. I lack self-discipline, and I hate mornings. But I want to see how God will work through this week, and I trust that he will. I will chronicle my journey in this blog...so if you're interested, check back.

The Ugliest Word in the English Language

scrutiny
noun
1.	the act of examining something closely (as for mistakes)
2.	a prolonged intense look